Lunar Legacy

        

Click to link to my "Will"...

 I am at a new beginning, finally.

        I have given up on capturing the moments in my life that I would scream from the walls about having been proof of the surreal and paranormal primordial paradoxes that make up the core of very existence.

        I am not going to rat out my friends for our crimes, I am not going to reflect on my experiences in life seeking to prove myself the terminally unique exception to the rules, as I am not.

        In the rooms of recovery I was taught that these things would come to pass if I just kept on coming back, to not leave until the miracle happened. The rooms were not on par with what I needed as the core to my change, that growth needed to come to me through another path, one that found me holding hands and sharing life with my wife, the mother of my daughter.

        I don’t drink anymore, though I don’t rule it out, it just doesn’t appeal to me more than the way I find myself and my situation as I will it to be. I don’t do drugs, and I unfortunately have to add “anymore” as they, and the life destruction they cause through people, places, and things are really tragically deadly for so many.

        I am ready now in ways only middle age would have found me, being the type of person I am. I think I always knew that my interests in career advancement were going to take decades to develop, and the long journey from the dawn of that realization and the night that found me ready to wake up in that new day would find me at this age, middle aged and hungry for the ability to bring to the plate what I could do to help other people, and in doing so find that enrichment in the lives of my closest people.

        I am ready now to start.

        I am going to write, just not an “expose”, or another washed out autobiography not yet deserved. I am going to start now the journey of a thousand miles, one step at a time, with each step along the way bearing the testament to my fruitful existence and the pursuit of “happyness” being the best reward of them all.

        I am going to write my first fiction novel, moving on from the graveyard of unfinished meddling I created in these websites as they were begun. 

   

        They are an impartial wisdom brought to light, that we can only share from the experience that is brought forth of the wisdom in our personal experience, the weight of its value, and the wisdom it passes on in the complex nature of reality and the human condition as experienced by, all too honestly, the writer.

        So my friends of old times, old days, and old ways… fear not the year of the rat has passed. I would be only harming myself now I know.

        The new writing will be a commercial venture, and you won’t find the journey anywhere but right here, as it would be a travesty to all of my readers if I left you only with those works I will, I now know, never, ever finish.

        I love you people. You have given me strength in your silent thousands, and at will, and outset you will find in your hands a completed manuscript of ongoing strength using the method I employ, and so thoroughly enjoy having developed it through various teachers and writers groups.

        This is the day I awaited. 

        The time to roll up my sleeves, and not make anymore excuses. I want a career, and I will have that AND my writing.

        It seems the world has forgiven me in an unforgivable situation: capable but not yet accomplished.

        I’m ready to get this done the right way.

1. Home

2. Family

3. Career

4. Writing (Noble Truths)

5. Music

6. Comedy

7. Film

8. Fold Path

        I don’t know what the Hell I needed the list there for, but neither did Brett Easton Ellis, so.

        I am beginning anew.

        All of this shit here is so old that I will never revive it, and I am finally done mourning it. It taught me what I needed to learn. Rest In Pieces.

• J.E. Ayers Brooks