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Dear Estranged Parents;

        I'll always remember you for blaming me when I was 12 for Brandon beating me severely, then later denying it ever happened, claiming it was my delusions, my mental illness.

        Lillian, I'll always remember you for going to Disneyland without me when I was little, then showing me the  pictures.

        Lillian, I'll always remember leaving me alone at home after school when I was 4, 5, 6 years old, and any other time you wanted, just locking me in, alone.

        Lillian, I'll always remember when I crashed my bike when I was little, you never let me ride it again.

        Both of you, I'll always remember you for kicking me out when I was 15 for no reason but to be rid of me. I lived away from home my entire Junior year of High School while you collected my birth Dad's survivor insurance of $700/month so y'all could play. I have the proof in my Social Security account. Fraud. I was bribed to come "home", and in my fatal mistake, ever repeated, I listened.

        I'll never forget how you kicked me out at 18 after making it clear you weren't caring if I wanted help to go to college or not. 

        I'll never forget you acted my whole life as if I wasn't the first chair first trumpet in band, (pro quality musician) even when I played football, my jazz ensemble 's, (even when I played lacrosse) and you never took note that I won collegiate awards in acting, lead roles in school plays and musicals, and that my credentials got my High School funding for a decade of improvements. You never took note that I was always a leader in academics, never took notice. 

        I'll never forget when you left me homeless at 18, when the band I was in was playing circuit gigs and recording with famous artists. 

        I'll never forget at 18, when you believed the cops that I had assaulted one, and acted like my psilocybin experiment was full blown addiction, and sent me to rehab.

        I'll never forget you told everyone you knew, friends, family, acquaintances that I was an addict, and made me a circus clown attraction at holiday gatherings.

        I'll never forget you took my mental health diagnosis as not your fault.

        You disallowed my access to your home, and my siblings, as I was deemed "a danger to children".

        Lillian, I'll never forget you, in every serious relationship I had, got the significant other's phone number, and cozyed up to them. Once you talked to them for many days, for many hours, you convinced them I was schizophrenic, and a drug addict, and incapable of making sane choices, and was a violent threat. They all used this as their final reason why they left me, crediting you .

        You kept me from my family, siblings, friends, and love interests.

        You then would pick up the pieces by committing me, over and over.

        You still, despite a dozen Psychiatrists over 25 years, claim I'm Schizophrenic, when the mass majority diagnosis is that I suffer from Bi Polar Disorder.

         Here's what I told my Aunt a few days ago:

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About my "parents"...

        The one thing that stops me cold in an awful self judgement is the fact that I let them destroy my life time after time, lying about me.

        No matter what they did, I subscribed to their empathetic bullshit when all they were doing was trying to get rid of me.

        When I returned from a cross country trip with my at the time fiancee and came to see them.. well ...

        I was at the neighbors house behind their (my freaking parents?) house in Newtown Square. The neighbor couple, this sweet old husband and wife saw me coming and quickly invited me to tea, and to tell them of my trip. 

        They let me use their phone to call Lillian and Brandon to tell them I was almost "home"

        Know what Brandon Brooks and Lillian did? They called the police and told them I was coming to their house with a gun, and that I said I was going to kill them.

        When I went there, a dozen cops assaulted me and took me down to the mental ward, and Brandon and Lil tried to have me State Hospitalized FOR LIFE.

        I submitted to treatment, and the Judge didn't go there.

        I ran away from the home for "invalid crazies" (respite) they put me in, and moved to Michigan, where I held down three jobs.

        All of my "so called" - "illness" was literally caused by Brandon and Lil. My traumas number so much and so many, I really do need medicine now.

Those cops could have killed me. They thought I had a gun.

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        If I told all of my stories, of your abuse, it would take years.

        You've used every opportunity you could to discredit me to further your own reputation and gains  as a "mother" and "father".

        You have kept me from my only son, surrounding him with these lies, and affecting  his life to where I can have no involvement.

        So bravo! 

You win the People's Choice Parents Award of Generation X.

        I win, though, I get to help others cut the abusive ties in their own lives, and avoid decades of physically, mentally, and emotionally damaging events.

        I win my life, now. My wife of 14 years now knows a better me. My daughter of 13 years hasn't had to miss me being a Dad. My work, isn't it obvious? Improved. And now, at 48, I get to run my business, and return to college for "Digital Media" to grow our potential at Ozenoz Media.

        I will never forget, and though in my heart I may forgive, I will never return to being that son.

Take care of yourselves.

-Joel

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P.S. Lillian:

        I didn't bother to mention all of the sexual abuse.

        Having sex with Jim Roncoroni with me in the room, even hoisting me up on him with you both naked. I was tiny, but it messed with me, and you took me to my room. That's why I never wanted to sleep with you.

       Or when you stripped in front of me in the basement at Hench Bros. Townhouses , it shamed and embarrassed the hell out of me.

        There was physical abuse when I was a baby, but most people won't buy that I remember.

        It's why you've failed at writing your children's book. Why your childcare record is spotty, why you move every few years... because it didn't end with me.

        It ignited sexual abnormal libido that surfaced when I was  three and four years old, and why my dysfunction continued , passing it on to children I messed around with at a young age.

        I know you passed it on from your childhood, as you've stated to me on numerous occasions.

        This is what I'm saying:

        My genetics were not your fault, my trauma was, and stunted my emotional growth calling what Dr.s have said for 26 years as "Bi Polar".

CALL THIS WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT- (BLACKMAIL?)

        But if you and this goddamned extended family of yours doesn't back off, I will let this out to anyone and everyone I see fit.

Good Riddance,

- Joel Edward Ayers Brooks

A member of The Krenn Family.

P.P.S.  You are not welcome.

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